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<p>Between bridal fittings, running around to make a million arrangements for your wedding day, and spending endless hours shopping for the trousseau—there’s one thing that flickers in the overwhelmed minds of most brides like a lightbulb. The need to detox.</p><p>If you felt a familiar pang reading this, you’ve come to the right place: because detoxing, often synonymous with weight loss, is a way for most brides (and grooms) to look their best on their wedding day. And if that’s your endeavour too, there is a chance you might end up making crucial mistakes. From fad diets to juice cleanses—there’s plenty of dubious information out there that can lead you astray. That's why we sought the help of nutritionists to create a nifty detox guide for you. But first, let’s get some basics out of the way.</p><p>AlsoRead0</p><h2>What is detox?</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-1_1638447952793.jpg"></figure><p>“Detoxing, like every other catchphrase in fitness, has been bastardised,” says Kavita Devgan, a Delhi-based nutritionist. “Most people consider detox to be something that will cleanse your body and think it requires you to do something very drastic. However, in reality, detox helps to clean up the systems from the inside in a phased out manner,” she adds.</p><p>Detoxing also means giving your body a rest—and the right diet is how you can make that happen. “In detox, both what you eat and what you don’t eat help give your organs some kind of a rest, especially the digestive system, so that the body can clean itself on its own. It is not your detox diet that is cleaning the system—you are just giving your body that opportunity to do the job it is supposed to do,” adds Devgan, who has also authored five books on nutrition, including T<i>he Don’t Diet Plan: A No-Nonsense Guide To Weight Loss</i> that came out earlier this year.</p><h2>But do you really need to detox before you get married?</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-3_1638447984990.jpg"></figure><p>The simple answer: YES! And not just because you’re getting married in a few weeks—rather, you should be detoxing cyclically for the sake of your health.</p><p>Says clinical nutritionist and diabetes educator,  Parul Malhotra Bahl, “Our body is naturally capable of detoxing itself. All we need to do is stop feeding it more and more toxins. So, if you’re getting married you should detox by eliminating junk food, alcohol, and high-calorie outside foods.”</p><p>Now you might be wondering why should you detox before the big day when you can do it any time of the year. Devgan answers, “Detoxing can help brides and grooms start a very stressful and strenuous period (i.e. the wedding festivities) in their lives. So if they do a detox well in time, they can be ready—body, mind, and soul—to enjoy their wedding.”</p><p>AlsoRead1</p><h2>Stop committing these mistakes in the name of detox</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-5_1638448097640.jpg"></figure><p>Detoxing sounds simple right? After all, you just need to give your body a break. But, how you make that happen is also equally important. So before we get down to the right way of detoxing—let’s go through all the wrong ways.</p><h2>1. Skipping meals won’t help you detox</h2><p>If your idea of giving your body a break involves skipping lunch, breakfast, or dinner—then we’ve got news for you buddy! Forgoing meals is a BAD idea. “Skipping meals will lead to a lower calorie intake, which will not only reduce your nutrient intake but also your energy levels. The time leading up to the wedding is going to be hectic, so being low on energy is the last thing you want,” explains Bahl.</p><h2>2. Cutting out carbs from your diet isn’t a good idea </h2><p>Not all carbohydrates are evil—you just need to choose the right ones for your diet. Says Bahl, “Carbs are the main source of energy and it must be a part of your diet. But instead of focusing on refined carbs like maida and sugar, eat complex ones in the form of whole grains, whole pulses, and whole fruits.”</p><h2>3. Following fad diets before your wedding can be counterproductive</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-6_1638448088073.jpg"></figure><p>There are so many “diets” out there promising so many miraculous things that it’s hard not to be a sucker for their sweet offerings. But here’s the thing: you don’t really know how your body is going to react to them. “You might lose a couple of inches while following these diets, but you might also experience sagging skin, lack of lustre in your hair, and low energy,” explains Devgan.</p><h2>4. Don’t try anything new or experimental</h2><p>When your wedding is around the corner, you don’t really want to cut it too close. This is the time to relax and put your body at ease. “Just like using new products and ingredients on your skin can lead to flare-ups, experimenting with food and workouts can do the same,” explains Bahl.</p><h2>5. Stay away from crash dieting</h2><p>We understand the urge to find quick solutions—especially when there’s barely any time left for the wedding. But trust the experts, as both Devgan and Bahl stress that starvation diets aren’t the solution. “If you want to lose fat and look radiant, start working on your lifestyle at least three months before the wedding. Give yourself that time and space,” recommends Bahl.</p><p>AlsoRead2</p><h2>This is how you must detox</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-4_1638448020554.jpg"></figure><p>Now that you know what not to do, let’s get down to telling you how you can truly detox and reap the benefits.</p><h2>1. Start your detox journey at least a month in advance</h2><p>Jumping into detox with just days left for your wedding can do you more harm than good. So if you really want the advantages of detoxing, you need to start at least four weeks before the wedding—if not sooner.</p><h2>2. Ease into the detox</h2><p>If you have never detoxed before, Devgan suggests starting with a one-month detox that allows your body to adjust to the changes you’re making in a phased manner. “Ease into the detox in the first week, do a slightly stricter detox in the second and third week, and during the fourth week you can ease out of it,” she says.</p><h2>3. Eliminate these foods from your diet</h2><p>“The rules of detoxing are clear: you need to remove processed foods from your diet,” explains Devgan. “Anything that comes in a packet or a can is completely out. You also need to eliminate aerated drinks, alcohol, and caffeine from your diet. Avoid animal protein as much as possible while you are detoxing, because it is difficult to digest. Lastly, remove anything that has too much oil in it and keep your sugar intake to a bare minimum,” she adds.</p><h2>4. Add the right foods to your diet</h2><p>Just eliminating things from the diet is not enough—you also need to feed your body nutritious foods. “Eat at least two fermented foods a day to replenish the good bacteria we keep losing on an everyday basis,” says Devgan, adding: “Also eat a lot of raw foods as they give the gut essential enzymes.”</p><p>It goes without saying that you also need to add nutrient-dense foods to your diet, so focus on foods like avocados, which are a source of good fats; leafy greens, which are teeming with fibre; and high-potassium foods like bananas and coconut water. “While you’re detoxing you need to focus on nutrition. All these nutrients help the body clean itself,” she says.</p><h2>5. Hydration is the key to detoxing</h2><p>Keeping yourself hydrated is a no-brainer at all times. But drinking ample amounts of fluids becomes all the more important when you’re on a detox. <br>And if water doesn’t cut it for you, then Bahl has a few suggestions you might want to take note of. “Add different liquids to your diet like lemon water, coconut water, soups, broths, and herb-infused water. These will not only increase your water intake but also add to your nutrient intake,” she says.</p><h2>6. Cut down on calories </h2><p>While the end goal of detoxing is not inducing weight loss, eating fewer calories than you normally would is recommended. And Devgan explains why: “If you’re eating less, you’re letting your body and its cells rejuvenate faster.”</p><h2>7. Feel free to add a green juice or smoothie to your diet</h2><p>Eating raw veggies in salads can get old really fast—which is why Bahl recommends adding a green juice or smoothie in between meals. Now before you roll your eyes and stick out your tongue in disgust, we want you to picture Malaika Arora Khan who looks stunning at 48—and swears by green smoothies, featuring avocado, cucumber, and broccoli.</p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Detox-bride-groom-inside-image-2_1638448043061.jpg"></figure><p>But what if you don’t have the time or energy to follow such an elaborate plan? Well then, follow Devgan’s guidelines that include eating three fruits a day, drinking 2.5 litres of water daily, and including one fermented food in your daily diet whenever possible. “If you just do this for about a month, you’ll notice such a huge change in your body. Your inches will go down, your skin and hair will be better, and you will have more energy,” she concludes.</p><p>And if all else fails, just remember: eating clean, fresh, and home-cooked meals can go a long way in your detox journey—no matter the life event coming up next. </p>

If you’re planning to detox by skipping meals or going on a juice cleanse, then you need to read this. 

Learn how to detox your body the right way before getting married, with the help of these tips from nutritionists—only on zeezest.com. 

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<p>It’s hard to think about your wedding without fantasising about the wedding night. After all, we’ve got hundreds of Bollywood movies and dozens of iconic ads telling us what is likely to ensue. In all probability, you’re going to be sitting on a bed of roses—literally—wearing all your finery, with a glass of milk in your hand. And as your spanking-new husband enters your bedchamber, the temperature starts to soar and your sizzling chemistry makes the night one to remember.</p><p>If that’s how you imagine your first night as a married woman, then we’ve got news for you sister: that’s not very likely to happen. Both of you are either going to be too tired to make anything happen or just be too awkward. That’s why, before the big night is upon you—you need to talk about sex with your partner, even if you’ve been in a relationship with each other for a while now.  </p><p>Yes, we know talking about sex is awkward, especially if you are entering an arranged married or if you haven’t been sexually active before. That’s why we are here so that you can get the discomfort out of the way and build a bond that lasts forever.</p><p>You’ve gotta talk about sex baby, and here’s how you can do it </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Sex-before-wedding-inside-image-5_1638447630766.jpg"></figure><p>“Young people in India are having more and more relationships before marriage, they’re dating and having sex,” says sexuality educator Karishma, who goes by ‘Talk You Never Got’ on Instagram. “That’s why it is important to talk about sex before marriage because people are coming into this with many preconceived notions,” she says.  </p><p>Especially when many people still believe that sexual activity is best kept for when you’re betrothed to somebody for life, talking about sex should be like any other crucial conversation—like finances and living arrangements—you might have before tying the knot.</p><p>AlsoRead0</p><p>Now, we might be preaching the agenda a bit too much, but it also goes without saying that you can’t possibly cover all the bases in one conversation. And you want that talk to be organic and free-flowing, so just remember these pointers and see where it takes you.</p><h2>1. Talk about your sexual history</h2><p>“In India, women are still expected to be virgins while there is no ‘bleeding in the sheets’ expected from men. And since that is a problem, a patriarchal one at that, it can sow seeds of distrust in the marriage. So it’s important for couples to have a conversation about the relationships they’ve had in the past,” explains Dr Niveditha Manokaran, who is a venereologist and sexual health physician based in Sydney.</p><p>Of course, you don’t have to delve deep into the details, but letting them know whether or not you have been sexually active in your past relationships is a good place to start.</p><h2>2. Marry history with biology and broach the topic of STDs</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Sex-before-wedding-inside-image-3_1638447578510.jpg"></figure><p>We understand: it’s never easy to talk about sexually-transmitted infections. But it is perhaps one of the most important things you should discuss before entering any long-term relationship— especially so if it’s marriage we’re talking about.</p><p>Says Dr Manokaran, who is more popularly known as <a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" href="https://www.instagram.com/dr_nive_untaboos/?hl=en">Dr Nive Untaboos</a> on Instagram : “You might be in the most understanding relationship on the planet, but having a conversation about STIs while you’ve been in it for a while is bound to put you in an awkward place. So if you and/or partner have been sexually active in the past, it’s only practical to get an STI panel done before getting married.”</p><p>And if you’re looking for an organic way to bring up the topic, then our resident expert suggests sneaking it in while you’re talking about your sexual history. “Talking about your sexual past is easier than talking about STIs, so segue it in,” she says. Another tip to help the conversation go down easier: don’t put it across like a mandate; make it a joint decision. For example, you could say something like this: “Since we’ve both been sexually active in the past, do you think we should get ourselves tested for STIs before we get intimate with each other?”</p><p>Now, before you give in to the urge to dismiss this suggestion, here’s a fact to consider: <a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12649059/">studies</a> suggest that STIs like gonorrhoea and chlamydia don’t show symptoms in as many as two-thirds of the cases.  Add to that the fact that these infections can lie dormant for years before flaring up, you’ve got a dicey situation on your hands—because you or your spouse could very well get infected months after being exclusively intimate with each other, putting your time together under the scanner.</p><h2>3. Talk about contraception</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Sex-before-wedding-inside-image-1_1638447598075.jpg"></figure><p>You mustn’t dare skip talking about this one if you don’t want children soon after marriage. And since the burden of birth control falls on women (another win for the patriarchal world we inhibit), you must also be brave enough to ask your to-be husband the pertinent question: will he wear a condom?</p><p>“If your husband is somebody who may not want to use condoms, talking about contraception before you get married will help you figure out your options in time,” suggests Dr Manokaran.</p><p>Moreover, this is also a good time to establish what you are comfortable with. “You need to be really candid and clear with your partner about what your expectations are when it comes to contraception,” says Karishma, adding: “Don’t be afraid to lay down boundaries.”</p><h2>4. Set your comfort zone and boundaries even if you’ve been sexually active with your partner before marriage</h2><p>You and your partner might have been together for a long time, but sharing a living space together is a whole different ball game. Having the sex talk will not only help you set expectations but also allow the both of you to be on the same page. Says Karishma: “Couples should have an ongoing conversation around what they’re comfortable with, what they want to do, and what they don’t.”  </p><p>AlsoRead1</p><h2>5. If you haven’t had sex before, set the tone for the first night</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Sex-before-wedding-inside-image-2_1638447603506.jpg"></figure><p>Getting nervous about your sexual debut is understandable. But instead of letting the unbearable suspense of the first night get to you, how about you discuss your preferences with your partner.</p><p>“Your first time doesn’t necessarily need to be penetrative or organismic. If you haven’t had sex with each other or at all, it’s more important for you to find a connection,” stresses Dr Manokaran. This becomes all the more crucial if you have concerns about getting physically intimate with your partner.</p><p>If you are worried about pain or are just not comfortable having penetrative sex on your wedding night, let your partner know. There are plenty of things you can do instead to set the stage for intercourse in the future, including exploring each other’s bodies, making out, holding hands, and even cuddling.</p><h2>6. Lastly, understand the different nuances of consent before you get intimate</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Sex-before-wedding-inside-image-4_1638447604677.jpg"></figure><p>Consent—well, it can really make things steamy in the bedroom. And violating it can turn things ugly faster than you can imagine. “Marriage doesn’t mean you have a license to have sex,” says Dr Manokaran. “Consent is important even when you’re married.”</p><p>Consent can be both verbal—spoken in yes and no and many other iterations—and non-verbal, like your partner waiting for you to sleep before coming to bed. And it’s important for both of you to understand it and respect it.</p><p>If you’re still struggling with the awkwardness of talking openly about sex, consider these parting words from Dr Manokaran: “Once you initiate a sexual conversation, the intimacy and closeness of any individual increases.” Your conversation may start with snippets from your past, getting screened for STIs, and talking about birth control—but remember to also infuse the little things to build intimacy. From what you prefer in bed to your wildest fantasies, the sky is the limit. </p>

Don’t carry the pressure of your first night with your new spouse into the marriage. Rather, talk about being intimate beforehand to set the right tone. 

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<p>Farida* (name changed) met the man of her dreams on an online dating website. After a whirlwind romance, the couple entered into wedlock within a few months. Little did she know that he had been ‘secretly’ sexting other women, and indulging in flirtatious behaviour. It was a chance encounter that led her to stumble upon the truth.</p><p>Despite being distraught, she confronted her husband, only to hear: “But I only texted. I didn’t sleep with these women.” Unfortunately, this is the reality of an increasing number of relationships today—more so with social media assuming the dual roles of ‘cupid’ and ‘villain’. Infidelity in the digital age cannot be clearly defined, which is why many unwarranted actions are deemed ‘normal’ and brushed under the carpet. </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Digital_cheating_giphy_screenshot_1640681951068.JPG"></figure><p>Aneesh Bhargava (33), a New-Delhi based advertising professional, confesses to having run into similar problems with his partner a few months ago. But they drew up a list of non-negotiables that fall under the ambit of ‘online cheating’.</p><p>“I recall my girlfriend texting her ex-partner at an odd hour, and when I expressed how uncomfortable I was, she quickly said, 'We are just friends. ’She even spoke to me about their chats, and I felt it was filled with sexual innuendos. That’s when we decided to have a talk and discuss what makes us uncomfortable. I was so angry when I found out that she had been speaking to him for months, without my knowledge. For me, that’s cheating,” he shares.</p><p>There are several scenarios that have ended with couples breaking up or opting for divorce over ‘so-called’ simple messages on social media. But is this terrain really as simple to navigate? What is digital infidelity, and what comes under its ambit?</p><h2>Digital infidelity: what does it really mean?</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_giphy%20%281%29_1640682085858.gif"></figure><p>Simply put, digital infidelity is when people use social media and/or any other electronic communication to cross boundaries in a relationship. Typically, this could look like someone sending suggestive messages or pictures to an individual other than their partner. These exchanges are not just limited to the sexual terrain—they could also be emotionally charged. Either way, these are dangerous and can wreak havoc on your committed relationship.</p><p>“Recently, an ex-flame contacted me on social media. This was during the first lockdown, when all of us were pretty much shaken by Covid-19. I remember reconnecting as friends, but things began to take flight and we began to have intense conversations every night. The frequency of our chats increased so drastically that my partner threatened to leave me. I don’t blame him, because I was seeking emotional support outside my relationship,” shares 35-year-old Ankita Patil*. </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Digital-Cheating-inside-image-1_1640620682641.jpg"><figcaption>© Craig Adderley from Pexels</figcaption></figure><p>The pandemic has certainly led to a surge in sexting and phone sex, as can be gauged by the many confessions that poured in.</p><p>“I have been in a relationship with my best friend for six years. After a few years, I realised that boredom was setting in. We did try to keep the spark alive, but he was too busy with work and that kind of put me off. So, I started speaking to someone I met online, and we indulged in crazy sexting marathons. We also ended up having phone sex and I think with time, it just became a habit. I was literally caught red-handed by my partner, who then confessed to having his own share of fun online. Fortunately, we have put this behind us, and are now trying to spice up our sex lives with each other,” confesses Pooja Sarin*, 41, a media professional. </p><p>AlsoRead0</p><h2>Is online cheating as painful as real-world encounters? Experts weigh in</h2><p>Online cheating can be as devastating and disastrous as real-world cheating, says Devisha Batra, senior counseling psychologist, IWill. “It can cause a lasting impact and trigger feelings of anger, insecurity, jealousy, and even a fear of abandonment,” she adds.</p><p>A 2008 research paper in the <i>Journal of Marital and Family Therapy</i> by Hertlein documented the many effects of online cheating being similar to real-world cheating—including less interest in sex in the committed relationship. </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_giphy%20%282%29_1640682468867.gif"></figure><p>When it comes to online cheating, the tangibility of physical infidelity vanishes (as has been depicted through instances shared above), thus pushing this question into a rather grey area. Here, defences like “But I didn’t really do anything” or “We were just talking” become all the more difficult to respond to— as the person accused might actually just have been talking. But why does this seem uncomfortable then?</p><p>“The answer to this question lies in how one defines the act of cheating. More often than not, it is to do with an emotional transgression within a relationship than just a physical one, and when looked at from that lens, an offline or online modality of indulging in the same becomes a rather moot point. It is just plain cheating which is bound to have deep psychological and emotional consequences,” explains Akanksha Singh Chandele, counseling psychologist and director,I Am Wellbeing (Nairatmya foundation). </p><p>AlsoRead1</p><h2>What, according to experts, qualifies as digital infidelity?</h2><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_ezgif-2-0da4c54bd7_1640686571136.gif"></figure><p>“For some, watching porn is a matter of cheating. Others might consider sexting or exchanging photos or emails infidelity. Flirtatious behaviour on social networks without moving into physical affairs is yet another way of betrayal. For some, having deep conversations with one’s ex is a form of cheating,” explains Devisha.</p><p>Akanksha agrees: “Every relationship has its own dynamics wherein partners tend to arrive at a mutual understanding of what is okay and what isn’t. This is dependent on personal, societal as well as cultural factors. These boundaries are set based on mutual trust and understanding between the partners of what is acceptable to them and what isn’t. What qualifies as cheating in the online or even in the offline world is when these set boundaries are violated by one of the partners and the mutuality of trust is broken.”</p><h2>Are there any ways to salvage relationships in this era?</h2><p>Online cheating, being such a grey area in itself, can lead to dead-end arguments between partners where one might feel wrongly accused, while the other might feel rightfully violated. There is perhaps no other way around this situation than to have an honest and open dialogue. However, it might help to establish some ground rules for how the partners wish to take that dialogue forward. </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_lets_talk_giphy_1640684932607.gif"></figure><p>“For example, the person who feels cheated on could decide to focus more on how they are feeling as a result of the act in question, rather than taking up an accusatory stance with regard to the act itself, and at the same time, the accused could decide to be transparent and try to understand why their partner might be feeling what they’re feeling. This is of course easier said than done,” says Akanksha. </p><figure class="image"><img src="https://assets.zeezest.com/images/PROD_Digital-Cheating-inside-image-3_1640620648269.jpg"><figcaption>© cottonbro from Pexels</figcaption></figure><p>It is also necessary to understand what are the actions and behaviours of the couple that led to insecurities in the relationship to begin with.“In addition, establishing boundaries between the couple is also important. One can also try and spend time with each other, and explore likes and dislikes in terms of emotional and physical intimacy,” advises Devisha.</p>

With increased access to social media and online dating websites, cheating has become rather common. But how does one define digital infidelity?

With increased access to social media and online dating websites, cheating has become rather common. But how does one define digital infidelity? Read more on zeezest.com. 